This Way

As I have written before, I am concerned that I am failing my toddler, S, by not getting him in the outdoors enough.  This afternoon, after I returned from work and he woke up from a nap, he requested to watch Lion King. He is so cute when he asks at first. With his sweet smile and bright eyes , he politely says " Watch King, please." I so want to say yes, but it would be at least the 9th time he has seen it this week and it is only Wednesday. I suggest we play outside or go to the park. The screaming begins. "NO WAY." He jumps to the far end of the sofa and covers himself with a pillow and shouts, "King!" Again  I brightly suggest we go in the car, he loves to "Go, car." But that suggestion brings on the hitting.

Ugh my sweet child! We have started using a time out chair for the first time today. The hitting has gotten out of hand, I have to physically hold him down on the chair and repeat what the doctor said yesterday. "No Hit. Time Out." She said that it has to be very clear to his developing mind why he is being punished,  no extra words or explanation. At this time she suggests he only go into time out for hurting others, this way he can learn that this is a very serious matter. His cute face twists into an expression I hate to see.  It is not my child.  Tears rolling down his face, lips curled up, eyes squinty, and a piercing scream.  After  two minutes of  this, his time out is up.  When I lift him up off the chair he wraps his arms around my neck, kisses me and says "Thank you Momma." Three minutes later he is back in the time out chair for throwing his sippy cup at my face. As I hold him on the chair and fight back my own tears, I think  "is getting out of the house really worth all of this?"

After two more time outs, a granola bar, a cup of milk, a cuddle, a lullaby, a diaper change, and a story; S is ready to go. His 2 month old brother, R, has been asleep this whole time. I have to quickly breast feed him and then we can load up the car.  I am so grateful that I live in an area where getting outdoors is simple.  In just a five minute drive we are at the paved river walk trail. That is a big enough adventure for us today. S waits patiently in his stroller by the side of the car as I load  R into the infant sling. With a shriek of delight and a point of a finger upward S calls out "Tree...Bird." A smile fills my heart. Yes!  I have not failed him.

As we begin our walk S greets his surroundings. "Hi, wah wah" is called to the river. "Hi, bird" is directed to a robin hopping around on the ground. And of course he says hello to every person or pet we see. He decides he wants to get out of his stroller and push it himself.  We walk at a toddler pace. Stopping to touch leaves and mushrooms.  Along the trail S climbs up on the park benches that look over the river he sits for a moment and looks contemplatively at the running water. He pops up quickly and continues along the trail with a shout of a new phrase, "this way." Oh what a happy phrase that is after  hearing "no way" all afternoon.

S runs up on a head and waits for R and I to catch up. He has a look of freedom and joy on his face as he runs down a small hill calling out "fun Momma!-this way."